5-12-12) at the Job: oh wow this guy gave her a recorder !

ok folks , first off,  i sometime’s  will edit my blog posts , after all a woman who bleeds 7 days out of the month and nearing menopause, now has to watch her rage , i’m no young chicky any more , even tho my man still gets  ”the willy”  for me , wink wink  , got a spanky last night , oh wait it was this morning , so ya , that’s  usually is a good thing.

ok, i edited this link.

http://ventamatic.wordpress.com/2012/05/12/5-11-12-back-stabbers-stupid-is-what-stupid-does/

————————————————–

ok now the short story of the  ”he gave her a recorder ! while at work”.

now i dont hate this girl , i just dont have trust,  i just dont know about her .

yep , this girl keeps having issues with people , she told me this before , but she did not say record her thoughts and day to day and on the job activity.

oh god now i really dont trust her ,  i’m pretty sure she is not going to record people talking to here on the job, but then again who knows.

so this got me thinking , like slightly changing the ways i rant , not that she can even find my blogs , but a fucking god damn recorder ?.

so what do i do now  people ?.

i mean while i was picking up the floor at work , cuz we was all done and had to do some clean up, as i walked by , i saw this guy (older fella) give her a recorder ,  god i dont like girls with head issues , at one hand she is opinionated and says what ever come to her mind and then the next she is having issues with that person or this person(mostly men) .

so now she has a recorder for taking notes  about all the crap she goes through , man i dont trust her really.

but i will try and be nice , because after all, i just want to get through the day  and get it done ,  man i so want to move on and leave that place , but no matter where ya go , its going to be with the same kind of people with personal head issues .

i think she needs help, she needs to see a Dr.

with me i blog, i try to be vagues when i blog and so i tend to go way over board when i blog my anger and my frustration and share it with others , cuz i know i’m not alone , there are people who are just as pissed off as me, but they physically  do stupid shit, this is why i blog, so i will hopefully not do stupid shit  and blogging helps me .

so i try to stick to my anger  points and not say people names , or places or company’s or what i do for work , for thats too  much detail and might give it away .

but a fucking recorder ?, really ?, the only time you need to document something in that manner is if your going to sue some one or sue a few people  or sue the whole company , or  if your evil , even black mail.

and that shit is illegal .  another reason why i am vague when i blog, ha ha .

i’m not going to go out of my way to be too nice, she might record that thought, lol, i’m going to try and keep  it simple and avoid her when ever i can and be nice about it .

you know , if she would stop wearing those god awful low V-neck t-shirts, she would maybe get pestered less and the way she acts , like she is all fun, well , just maybe , alittle bit , she is asking for it, i mean the way she jokes around with some of the guys and people in general , almost makes it look like its ok for them  to do so .

no one hardly does that to me , why ?, i dont really create that kind of   “on the job”   relation ship,  i’m no longer  so touchy touchy , not any more , stop thats shit when i found out no one really had me in their best interests at work.

so ya this blog is not so angry now , is it ?.

yours truly .

Ventamatic.

 

 

 

5-11-12) Update: job politics: stupid , is what stupid does.

Update: i’m editing this one , trust me on this , i’m not afraid or anything, my next post will be short but maybe interesting and explain some of the why, LMAO

yup, one of those kinds of rant-a-blog moments that is going to make you wish you was the fly on my wall , oh yaaaaa, i must be getting close to my monthly bleeding.

here we go folks, come on , get on and enjoy the ride to my little bull shits of rantness.

had to do edits:  are you ready ?, your sure ?, ok, hold on tight .

first my workplace let go of 2 people , one i can understand why, the other one they let go , left me puzzled , i mean i can think of other people i would rather fire , one comes to mind.

At my job, it’s not a guarantee  40 hours per week , my hours per week varies , like every one elses does .

then i ask my supervisor about volunteering  for extra hours on nights .

i work on day shift, well , he told me i have to ask and its a first come , first serve basis , just ask some one on nights, so i thought ok, thats fine,   cuz i thought people get asked if they wanted to or not.

so on saturday the 5th , while i was working i saw this person(not the boss)   go up to and ask her if she wanted to volunteer for some hours on night side , i’m thinking to my self , my boss just told me a short while ago , that i had to ask.

and this person that did the asking i have worked with quite a many years .

its my fault that after 15 years being in this place , that i got too trusting and comfortable with people,    i thought this person had my back , he knows i need the hours ,  he know i have a mortgage to pay on and bills and shit, and that the stress rests on my shoulders.  then i find out that she and 2 others are regulars that work nights and i would say that my fault.

so even tho those spots are being taking with out them having to even ask each time , i still have to ask each and every time, ok fine by me , some day i’m going to get lucky .

and then i find out while i was working yesterday , that a few people got asked if they wanted fitted ear protection, i was not ask and again i have been there 15 years , and i was told to go up there and ask.

in the past i complained  about the cheap pieces of crap ear-plugs that they provided , i know the amount of sound that , that shit supposed to block and they do not work , they are so cheap they wont buy better ear plugs .

so i had to go walk up there and talk to her and go through this debate and shit, and she did not like it , nor did she want to put me on the list, but after i told her about the ringing in both my ears, she eventually put me on the list, then i got fitted for ear protection. so that was cool.

as for liking my job, i would say its typical for me to now not like my current situation that is going on, but that life and now i dont really trust any one , not so much any more , i no longer know where i stand , but i will be just great.

and H.R. , i already know cant do shit, they have proven that time and time over again.

i just going to have to learn how to handle on the job politics, it will be a good exercise

but when i go there , i have to be nice , i try to be , just to get through the day and sign out and go home.

i dont mind asking for extra hours, but in the past i was asked , was asked quite a few times, what to know who asked me , my boss and this other person on days

so i will just watch my own back, and its my fault for thinking people at work had my back .

the only man i’m giving any blow jobs too,   is my husband ,   he gets all my blow jobs ! , relax folks LMAO !, i’m not the kind of girl who would even think of giving   “on the job- blow-jobs”  , Har! Har !.

at least my man has my back.

and ya i will again try to be nice just so i can finish the day and i guess, maybe just getting the hell out of there is a cool thing.

i dont like it there , so if i’m unhappy and yet need the hours , what do i do in the mean time ?.

ok, now that i got my  bitch-ness out, i feel much better.

yours truly .

Ventamtic.

4-1-12) do ya all miss me ?, oh ya , feeling the ITCH !

hello ladies and gents .

ah man what a time. i actually was too busy to bitch or tell a funny story or what ever else that happens to set me off into the grey old land of   “i love to be pissed off”.

and no this is not the boobie update you all been hoping for ,  i have the number to call,  just had too much on my mind and getting distracted.

well my sister Doris went from stage 4 cancer to stage 3, we all hope she gets better  before her scheduled surgery, which she does not even know when that is yet  , she is so optimistic , maybe that’s  why i have not written   a bitchy post lately,  she is kinda rubbing off on me, wink.

lets seeeeee what else can i think of here , hmmmmm, oh ya !, here’s one for ya .

for a while now i was suspicious  of this one girl at work , you know the same one that narked on this guy for stealing hours off the clock and the turn around and started to do the same damn thing,  ya ya that girl , lol.

well some time ago i saw some product in a box, but what made me scratch my head was the same stuff in a tan plastic grocery bag, so i took one out and saw that alot of shit on this one did not expire yet.

so i go talk to the supervisor in charge on that day and he thought nothing of it , at this time i was just puzzled.

then i saw sometime way later like a couple of months ago or so , but in this year , she was carrying a box with her out the door which had her small back pact looking purse on top of the medium-sized box, i thought how strange and that made me raise my brow , thats when i started to watch her very sneaky like , because after the time card incident , i no longer really trusted her .

then one day it happened , oh ya baby !, i caught her !, i’m like fuck,  she is so fucking stupid !, as i was running the assigned product on the machine , i go to turn around and her she is grabbing more then a fricken handful of the product i was running , this was on a saturday .

i looked at her and said something like , “are you kidding me !”  and she put it down quickly,  and she said she only wanted to take a few home , and i told her you cant do that ,  not a fucking handful,  i told her you dont want to get fired , cuz you can get fired for that.

there is actually a company policy where they let you take one item , but you cant use them till the day it starts , not before.

but this stupid chick took a fricken handful folks , but dont worry , she put them all back .

later when i had the opportunity to talk to her and explain it to her .

i told  her dont ever let me catch you do that again  , if i catch you do that again i will have to go to the head supervisor and tell him what has been going on and  i dont want you to loose your job over something as stupid as this .

so she felt stupid and said she wont do it again , the funny thing is before i caught her some one else caught her before me  , i found this out on sunday .

well that person might keep their mouth shut , but i wont , not if i catch her again , after all i will keep my word , like i told her if i catch ya again , thats it , i have to open my mouth .

our company is pretty fair , gives people alot of chances to correct them self and shit,  so if i do have to say something down the road , then i think alls that will happen is she will get written up and there will be a big group meeting , pretty much repeating what was said to all of us when we first got hired , and paper work on the subject will get handed out and we sign it and shit, stuff like that.

but a whole fucking handful , that was way to epic and right behind me too, even more epic and retarded.

then sometime way after that , she starts talking about people being late  and not doing a good job because  they dont like their job and going off sounding like she is all better than that , ya she is a good little worker , but she also is dishonest and  steals .

so now i really dont trust her much , shit girl keep your mouth shut and straighten up your own thieving , narky ass up before you go talking shit about every one else ,  shit she’s  two faced or is it double standered ?.

let seeee is there anything else i can go off on, hmmmm , ok heres  another little diddy , but shorter .

on last thursday , that day was going just great , things running smoothly , and around 5:pm  i started to smell a strong Oder of baby powder and then later , shit, thats right folks i smelled poop !,  i asked this guy , “hey do you smell that ?” and he perked up his nose and said ya , i looked over to where it was coming from and saw that some night shift people was working in this other area .

of my god , i could not stop cracking up laughing , i must have done that for about 20 minutes , and the other guy was not helping much , for he was joining into the humor of it all,  but we stopped working around 5:30pm and was time to clock out .

so ya that it so far folks .

as for me , i’m doing fine , things ar what they are and life is a ball of fun.

yours truly . Ventamitc

 

 

 

2-11-12) happy goings, oh she wants her old job back and other rants

well ladies and gents.

it’s that time of year again, oh wait i did that already, now let cut to the bull crap guys, ha ha .

so far things are looking on the up and up and i’m happy at the present moment , but i know that feel good  ”bull-crap-O-ramma ” is only temporary.

well like all you people i did my taxes and i’m happy to say i got a decent refund back , i do my taxes on this website called “taxactonline” (without the quotes)  .

then i went to the Dr. to get an adult physical in order too not  get a surcharged by my health plan, it’s a big fine, yeesh !, got my test results back and all is normal and good , except my thyroid  as  usual   runs alittle low , one time is normal and then another time it’s not and no i’m still currently NOT taking meds for it , i had this problem for 3 years now with out meds, the problem is that i did not have the funds to continue my chosen regimen for it , so i need to re-look that over and get back on it or a form of it .

now that part is over , i need to make an appointment  to go see my gynecologists /OB/GYN (i think  it’s called?) and get my exam there , i’m due for a pap smear, pap smears  are not fun, that metal that we all call “the jaws of life”, i hate it, lol.

after that i need to get a mammogram , i never had one and this will be my first one , so i will update this blog or make a part two , i will call it   “boobies get squished and other rants” .

oh i’m even changing banks, i hate my old bank, fee’s this and fee’s that , so now i’m switching to a credit union, i already got it started , it was great, and i never got that kind of personal service from any one like that before , i mean i was treated like a 14-year-old with alot of respect, meaning , she gave me a tour and showed me how to do stuff like how to make a deposit through a cash machine, i mean she was so nice and thorough and i found out i have good credit and my credit score at the moment is …….854 !.

and then at work , remember miss “Lice-o-Matic” well awhile back like 2 years ago or maybe a bit longer  , the lady who had lice for over a year and an a curable but highly contagious  eye infection for over 6 months , that lady was so fucking gross,  even tho she’s gone right now, i still have to watch what i say at work , pretending  that i like that person is so wrong, ha ha , sorry, yes i’m a bitch , but keeping my moth straight on that one is a bitch .

wellllllllll sheeeee want her fucking job back, at first i thought people was pulling my leg, after she grossed all of us out and almost turned all of us int fucking germa-cooties- afobe  , ya i spelled that wrong, still funny.

so i went to talk to my boss about it and asked him , if it was true that she called the office wanting her old job back and he said yes, and then i asked him does the main boss lady know this and he said yes, and then i asked him are you 2 hiring her back and he said no and i then said even if we had a few openings , and he said and get this ,  ha ha , we dont want her back , i then said good,  because she was the reason for all my heart problems, haha , like for real folks, she caused all my heart problems , the Dr. pretty much pointed that out as part of the problem , but not the whole problem, dont worry my heart is fine now.

but my paranoia  of the lice lady is not , fuck i hope she dont come begging her job back, she like living in Wisconsin ,  some other state and i hope she fucking stays there , i mean , she give me the cootie  creeps so bad that i friended her on my facebook page , why?, so i know when she is coming this way !, so i can make plans and fucking HIDE ! folks.

by the way , if you all find a bunch of miss spellings and typo’s , its cuz i’m typing in a hurry and have to leave for work soon, but i had to get this off my chest, just thinking of her right now is causing me to itch and feel crawly all over , yuck.

people please say alittle prayer that she finds work up in that other state she is in “Wisconsin” on please pray that she stays up there.

and here is a link to one of my older posts of her (kinda) from last year

http://ventamatic.wordpress.com/2011/02/07/2-6-11-bitch-fest-will-it-ever-end/

well i guess this is all for now and my next blog will be called,

update: ” boobies get squished and other rants” .

yours truly .

Ventamatic

1-20-12) Merry-go-round’s and their messed up shit

hello lady’s and handsome fellows.

how are we today ?, are we merry ?, are we snowed in with our lover ?, or do we all just have that horrible thing called cabin fever ?.

well i’m not snowed in, today i wish i was , but then the magic man who is one of my many brother bears might come and rescue me, “Oho NO !” not that, ha ha .

i swear that man , who besides my husband , can drive every where in snow , shoot,  ha ha .

except that one winter in , oh i think year 2008 maybe, oh i cant fucking remember, right now as i type, i got a Vodka drink of sorts in my damn hand, shit, why am i even blogging, hee hee, oh thats right i got to get my ugly ugly inner self out, so i can be a nice irritating bitch at work , instead of this fucking bitch that wants to strangle the “ever-so-living-life” out of you , MMMmmm, sounds tasty.

so is this whats it like to type drunk, oh well who cares right now, later,  as always i will come back and read my posts and laugh at myself , i always do, after all this is my therapy blogging page of rants, funny shit and every day bull shit ,  the rants are always  blown  out of proportion, why you might ask ? .

its simple, therapy is about  getting   the ugly out, so you dont get fired or get your ass kicked or what ever else happens when you blow up, and i like to smile .

so today bull shit rant is this , work as always . and since i have a drink in me, plenty of fucked up typing to boot, so what ever, just decipher as you people always do,  oh yaaaaaa !.

todays wonders was at this area that i  blogged  about the last time, that is why i always put the stupid date first on my title of my blogs.

remember me telling you about the “arrogant little twit” ?.

well he actually not a bad kid, he made me laugh thats all.

well i was at the same spot he was , and remeber when  said that  80% of the time that station is easy, the other 20% is when sometimes things are fucked up, well it was one of the those days when it was a 20% percent day , when things are fucked up.

now i was getting pissed, why ?. oh soooo simple, you see , on the 80% good days , they have one extra person  at this one station, when one is not even needed , but get this folks, when on some day  i’m assigned at that same spot on a run that most likely is shit, they just forgo that one extra person, yep i get to bitch and have a fucking tantrum today .

it dont make sense , it’s  just fucked up.

the person in charge of that area is supposed to see shit happening  and help out as needed, which they try and do sometimes ,   its the type of situation where one shouldn’t  have to say,  ”Help ! ” ,

should not even have to ask for help, when i’m in charge like that,  i at least try and give my best attempt at helping,  so the person should not have to ask for help,  its just a given, its my area, if i’m assigned to be in charge for that day , its that simple,  even when one  cant keep up with the fucking shit thats happening, they  still should have to try .

thats when help is most needed , keep your shit together and stop playing and fucking around, shit , get a life and do the job, even if your having a hard time doing it,  just try , and do it and help others  stationed in your area.

why do they have to say i need help, they should see that , what ? are they fucking blind, have their hands down their pant’s  , what ?, sorry if i’m rude, its a therapy blog right ?.

no i’m not sorry, fuck off, lol.

oh boy i’m getting my self in trouble, oh geeeeeeeee , i need a spanking dont i ?.

well folks that was my day , me at this one station and it was just one of those

20% days, lol .

now that i got my ugly out, i feel better , thanks folks for letting me do that, now i can be a nice little bitch again.

hugs, i love you all.

yours truly Ventamatic.

 

 

 

1-16-12) Arrogant little twit

hello lady’s and gents.

time for another story of the  ”i like to bitch” .

i must be getting close to being on the rag, but hey i was a good sport and did not chew his little head off,  ”good girl” for me .

i was assigned in this one area at work with a few other people, well any ways its part of my job to walk around and do this and that every now and then, and boy !, it was a very boring day, everything was running just fine.

well as i got back from taking stuff to down stairs , i started to walk about, well this 19-20 something year old kid, told me i had to stick around so that he  ”the little arrogant twit”  can  go take piss and get a drink of water when ever he had too , i’m thinking to my self as he was saying this shit to me  ”your saying this to a person ” , now i was not  wandering around alot on the floor, i never do , and this twit said this.

now he probably meant  to say it in another way, but it came out wrong from his mouth .

now i was a good sport about it and you want to know why, cuz guys like that are fresh meat, easy to tease and annoy, so thats what i did, i had fun !, ohhhhh yaaaaaaa baby !.

i did what i  was told but in a way he did not like ,  i did it all with casual light body English and i was not rude about it ,  and it did annoy him.

well , later he went to the person in charge of our area for the day and told her that his legs are getting really stiff from standing in one spot all day and wanted to go home, she told him to tell that to the supervisor that was in charge for the day,  so he did, the supervisor let him leave at lunch time .

first he tells  me to stick around and stand in one spot with him, which by the way i can do that job that he was assigned to do all by myself and then some 80% of the time , the other 20% i have a hard time kinda if things are going crappy haywire , ha ha.

now that cracked me up , i think he really wanted to leave cuz i was annoying him, but what ever.

so ya i was a good sport , i had my fun, it was still a great work day and i ended up doing his job by myself with my eyes closed, ZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzz .

short rant , but a funny one.

yours truly Ventamatic.

 

1-6-12) Rant ! : Time cards, little thief, points finger at…

well boys and girls.

its time for the rant of the new year , yep its year 2012, time for me to BEEEEEOOCH !.

ha ha , oh that part was actually funny. ok  here’s  my rant.

a few days ago on a great work day , yep that part was great, yep great, but any ways , when we got done  and it was time to “clock out”,  you see we dont have the normal time card system, we write in , thats  right we write it in folks.

we write down our start time, the time we are supposed to start and when done we write down when we clock out, that where the problem is .

you see , i kinda know that people as a rule fib on their time cards ,  it’s just an assumption on my part,  i dont do this of course , why bother, i just write down the proper interpretation of the  ”7 minute rule”  of thumb, i dont care really what any one else does, with their cards really.

now here’s my problem , again a few days ago , some one , as they was clocking out or watching some one look for their card , waiting to clock out, noticed that this person clocked out about 45 minutes later than they actually got done, and then  complained about that one person time card, now this is the stupid part,

this person after they made that comment, then turns around and admits to doing the same damn thing, i’m like , thinking to my self “what ?” your bitching about them stealing and yet your stealing, oh this person was mad cuz this other person was stealing more hours off the clock.

now this part sucks, i’m a lead, so i thought after this person complained about it and yes the bigger thief was told not to do that .

but now the complainer is still stealing hours off the clock, i caught them twice, so then i had to say something, yep twice.

i would have  never kept an eye on this person if they never said they do it too.

and thats why i’m pissed, i’m not a baby sitter, but i am supposed to be the eyes and ears of the company , in my department and on my shift.

the other thing is , is that i actually like this person, now i guess that going to end, i even complained about the fact that this is going to cause  problems for me.

so we will see on that part, but this is going to be the 2nd and the last time i say anything about it .

i explained to the person in charge , that i  would have never said anything about the complainer , but they admitted to doing it too  ,  but  since the got this other person called to the carpet because of them ,  and they turn around and keep on stealing them selfs, made me have to say something twice cause they did it twice.

god why did she have to admit to doing it too, i would of never noticed , if she kept that part secret.

you dont nark when  you’re doing it too, come on , use your stupid head, i hate thief’s  who think just because they are cool with every one , that it makes it different for them.

if you’re a  thief and your going to nark some one off,   dont admit to the same shit and i will know no better.

so now i’m going to do this silent protest, if i get some on the job shit about it , in some ways its  worse than  doing the right thing, but it will help me see where every one stands on the honesty of the “time card ” issue.

if i get slack. this is what i’m going to do, and i will do it for a short period of time.

when i go to clock out and it says , for example, 3:03 pm on the clock, then thats what i’m writing down, i’m going to write down what the clock says , as my clock out time.

and if i’m asked why i’m doing it that way , then i will say something like this ,

“i’m just tired of guessing on my own honesty of clocking out, you can guess it for me”

so people what are you thoughts on this post ?

and yes there is alot of typing typos  in this post, oh well, i’m tired and sick, cough cough .

and happy very late new year!

 

12-7-11) update: nuts & bolts, the screws of life

part 1)   http://ventamatic.wordpress.com/2011/11/24/11-24-11-nuts-bolts-the-screws-of-life/

————–

well folks, i guess the shits of life do get worse, yes they do.

as for the sad thing, my sister’s cancer did hit the lymph nodes , in fact it spread throughout her body, but not her organs yet,  she told me it is stage 4  cancer, but she is going to go through the treatments any way,

if all goes well and she can handle the first few treatments , one treatment every 3 weeks for two years, that maybe , just maybe they can put it into remission, its treatable, but not curable, meaning there is a 50/50 chance it might come back.

i’m scared for my sister, but i cant let her know that, i have to be there , no matter what her decision is ,   or ends up being,  i want to be there to make her laugh, make her smile, and like this one girl on facebook says, be her cheer leader !.

i lost my grand parents to old age,  i lost my dad to heart disease  and diabetes , i lost my mom to cancer, lost a brother to pulmonary disease , and another to suicide.

and i lost other people i know, life is bringing me down right now. i have another brother and sister who would rather have a sucky attitude and hide from whats happening right now, hopefully they will come around.

but i dont like to run away , when its something you cant run away from , like dying and death , no choice but face the facts of life, you cant run from that, you can try , but your number gets called any way .

when something like this hit you or some one you love, its your time or their time to be a warrior , a fighter and dreamer, gots to fight the fight .

so people, if this sort of thing hits close to home, dont run away, thats the wrong decision .

yours truly .

Ventamatic.

 

 

 

11-24-11) nuts & bolts, the screws of life

Hello every one.

your probably wondering about the title of this post.

this month has been filled with nothing but bull shits of lifes big frustrations , repetition, anger ,  and then sadness.

first off  is about work , they have been sticking me in the same area/work station for over 2 months(i lost count),  i was loosing my mind and starting bitching about it ,  saying things like  ”i’m the new improved of so and so (wont mention her name, who does not work at my job no more, she moved), ha ha , the only difference is i dont pick my nose and eat it and scratch my yearly supply of lice and pink eye infections.

my wrists was hurting, my lower back was killing me and my right shoulder, all from being slightly bent over on all the other times, the conveyor tables were redesigned , they had some stupid table thing soldered onto the conveyor , so in order to keep the product from falling over , you had to be slightly bent over for 7 or more hours a day, they could of designed that part to drop down for when we did not need it.

and then there  is the sadness, last week on the 15th of this month , i found out that my sister Dee(middle sister)  has cancer , i guess she was kinda ignoring the growing lumps , one on her leg, one on her lower tummy, and one under her armpit,  the doc biopsied the one under her arm pit, and said the cancer so far has not hit the lymph nodes , at least that what they say, yesterday they ran more test’s , like blood work and other stuff.

so i wont know what kind of cancer and at what stage it s and whether or not they can do anything for her , or what my sister’s final decision  will be.

and i wont probably know anything till next month or earlier.

thats the thing about my family that just pisses me off, they are so detached from me, we are all so far apart. now that this is happening,  they are still far apart, they still ignore the phone most times when i try to call them, i only try to call once in a great while (except my brother Eddie, he dont ignore me ) , like what did i do to them , nothing , thats what, my hubby says they are jealous of me kinda, and i think, what for ?.

but ya , one fucked up moth so far , and maybe more to come ,

and today is Thanksgiving, we are invited over to my hubby’s friends place for thanksgiving.

so even tho this post sounds all bad, i know its not as bad as i’m making it out to be, ok, folks.

i’m happy to be alive, and happy to be loved by the people who do note ignore me completely, at leat i matter to some body.

the important thing for me to remember , is that i matter to me , that i can love, can laugh , and share .

so i end this note with this .

this is the day to be thank full.

yours truly .

Ventamatic.

10-12-11) Random dog shit of life

well, not a very exciting or what ever blog this time folks.

things that are pissing me off, well myspace is pissing me off, the only reason i have not deleted it yet , is cuz of a cool pen friend i have in Germany, she has a myspace and she blogs on myspace and a few other cool people too,

but the thing thats pissing me off is that myspace is going to close down its myspace forums, that how i found this other cool person, his name is Rawb, and he has this very  handsome dog.

myspace is stupid, they might as well as shut the whole site down, i might delete my account any way, but i will wait till they close the forum first, people are making a uproar about the forums, so who knows.

another thing thats pissing me off is money, but i cant bitch too much , cuz i know there are people who have no money at all, but still i cant help it , but bitch ,   now i know the economy is going to the shitter for sure,   starting this month would be the time of year where i would make the most money and hours, but nope not yet.

so ya i’m  feeling  alittle depressed and tired of working and getting no where.

at least this year i was still qualified to get a vacation and with the big guy, the one who stamps out paychecks, he is going to step down,  so now there is this world-wide search for his replacement and that could be a bad thing or a good thing, but i’m not going to be too optimistic on that one,    next year i might not be eligible  for a vacation, i just dont know .

so now i’m between stressing about money and not giving a shit every month , i’m the only one who seems to think  that having a job is far  most important and my man , well , he lives in his own little world(at least thats the impression i get ) where job will find you ,   i just want to give up and get shit face every day ,    this is the sad part,   i’m drinking more then i ever have,    i drink cuz i’m depressed and angry and sick and tired of life , and getting that high, that buzz from booze helps me forget and to not get so uptight about bull crap thats attached to the dollar  bill .

yep i’m feeling alittle down, my mind and soul is getting too tired for this shit.

sorry that this sound really bad, dont worry ,  i wont off myself . it’s the love and support from other people who keep me going from the inside out.

and i have not lost the faith yet,  so ya , this is how i’m feeling for right now , maybe things will get better,  god ! i hope they do get better .

so i say my thanks and send my love to all of you and my prayers too, cuz i know your having it way harder than  me right now .

yours truly .

Ventamatic.